Tag Archive | "car polish"

Birds Hate Cars


Remember an old Hitchcock film called The Birds? If not, it concerned the massed ranks of assorted feathered fiends menacing a community. OK, look out of the window. Is your car outside? If so, look around at the trees and buildings and see if any of the avian enemy are lurking nearby, because they cannot be trusted.

Obviously life is not a movie and these birds are probably not going to try and peck your eyes out or pinch your kebab. No. It’s much worse. They are planning to poop on your beloved motor. It’s a fact; and now it appears that the colour of your car may well dictate the extent by which your bodywork is soiled.

Red paintwork is, to a bird, like a red rag to a bull, apparently. They just can’t stand it and owners of such cars are the most likely to complain. Not that other colours fare much better. In order of preference to these winged marauders blue is next, closely followed black, white, silver and grey with green rounding out the most popular hues. Presumably they think that green cars are just grass and they can do that anytime.

Of course, this is just based on motorists’ responses and there is no actual proof as such that birds are that vindictive. It may be that they just like admiring themselves in reflective surfaces or prefer cars that are parked under trees. Whatever, seed-eating birds (and that’s pretty much all of them) deliver grainy poo which is worse than, say, that belonging to meat eating raptors or seagulls.

As if the offence wasn’t enough, leaving their deposits on your precious paintwork can cause damage that could cost money. Bird droppings contain acids but it is the softening effect on paintwork that causes the real problems because moisture mixes in and forms a mould.

The solution is in preventative cleaning and quick action when assaulted. Always make sure you’ve got a goodly coating of wax which helps protect the lacquer layer of your paintwork. A couple of branded wipes designed for the job should be in every glove box – but remember, these will take off not just bird droppings but also protective waxes so replace it ASAP.

If all else fails then a good polish should put the shine back. Car polish almost infinitesimally removes a layer which is why wax is best for everyday shining. As a last resort a stronger product is needed that removes blemishes, swirl marks and surface scratches (one’s that are so light you can’t feel them when a finger is run across). Again, the car must be re-waxed.

Birds are like politicians. They do things we don’t like and they make a mess. Mass destruction is out of the question as old ladies will come to your house and fire-bomb your ride. As with politicians, you’ll just have to live with it.

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bG9nZ2VyX0xvZ28uanBnIjtpOjI7czo3MzoiaHR0cDovL21vdG9yYmxvZ2dlci5jby51ay93cC1jb250ZW50L3dvb191cGxvYWRzLzMtTW90b3JfQmxvZ2dlcl9Mb2dvLnBuZyI7fTwvbGk+PGxpPjxzdHJvbmc+d29vX3ZpZGVvX2NhdGVnb3J5PC9zdHJvbmc+IC0gQXV0byBOZXdzPC9saT48L3VsPg==